The Grand Ol Snouter: Fourth Edition
A monthly circulation
No noise not good noise
Noise complaints reached an all-time high this weekend in the party season build-up to the umpteenth Midsummer Madness Festival. A record 248 complaints were received from irate neighbours by the Noise Squad. Chief Inspector Snoop told the Snouter; “I can’t believe how inconsiderate people can be.
“There are families with young hounds next door to where parties are going on, and the revellers just don’t get the message – their music isn’t nearly loud enough.” In one incident in the portside suburb of Fisherton, a stereo system was lobbed through a neighbour’s window.
“The hound was so fed up that he couldn’t hear the music properly, even though the windows were all open, that he took his own stereo system and threw it into his neighbour’s house. “Apparently he was shouting ‘If you can’t afford a decent noise box, use mine’,” explained Chief Inspector Snoop.
“We get this every Festival time and now we have officers going around all night checking the output on stereos at parties all over Houndside. “If the music isn’t loud enough we issue two warnings first, before going round and installing a mandatory 700 watt PA, complete with extra bass, all set to maximum. It’s just our way of making hounds respect their neighbours,” he added.